Friday, January 4, 2008

Enter the New Year's Resolution Posse

Our gym, much like most if not all other gyms, are crawling with them! For the next two or three weeks, the gym is like a wave of untapped potential. "This time I'm gonna get swole, Bro! It's gonna be bench presses, bb curls and quarter-rep squats three times a week, and always benches on Mondays, dammit! My entire posse, similarly dressed in spandex pants and too short tees and having the same haircut, are gonna roll with me and psyche me up, brother. It's gonna be a lot of "All you, bro", "One more rep, dude", "U da Man", "Light Weight!", "Ain't nuthin' to it but to do it", "Come on Diesel", "Feel the Burn", "Go for max" and "I could'a had a lot morereps, bro, but I don't wanna fry my CNS". And there will be lots of hi-fivin', grunting, menacing look-throwing and invisible suitcase-wearing while me and my legendary iron warriors of steel hoist 85 kilo benches, damn near 100 kilo deadlifts and 40 kilo cheat curls. Plus, I know a bodybuilder who hooked me up with a sweet deal on creatine. It's like a year past the expiration date, but my bro said it's nothin' to worry about - you just have ta mix it up a li'l bit more to dissolve it and not being squeamish 'bout the dosage. This behemoth also said he could hook me up with some discount vet-grade winny and some clen for rockin' and rollin' when I max out my genetic potential in about three months."

Oh brother....... I'm thinkin' these people will suddenly disappear come February. Where to? Take your pick - perhaps they will be abducted by the reptilians from the Planet Niburu because they are such immaculate specimens of the human race. Perhaps they will beam up to the mothership behind the comet. Perhaps they're at home playing Nintendo or Wii complaining to their buddies that "Yeah; I was well on my way to gettin' swole when my old knee injury started to act up - dammit - I was THIS close to considering going for Pro".

But I'll see them again in a year.......

3 comments:

Pigeon said...

Perhaps they're at home playing Nintendo or Wii complaining to their buddies that "Yeah; I was well on my way to gettin' swole when my old knee injury started to act up - dammit - I was THIS close to considering going for Pro".

Still pushing some buttons here right ?

Wilhelm said...

Hhhmmmmm?

Never thought of you as the type to be conscious 'bout gettin' your swole on and considering pro bodybuilding.

Sure I'm pushing buttons, but yours were not the intended buttons in this case

CresceNet said...

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